Advocating For Yourself in the Workplace
It’s a fact that women get paid less than men for the same work.
It’s a fact that girls in general are raised to be more considerate and polite and to make life easier (never harder) for the people around them.
And it’s a fact that men in the workplace are mentored on more business specifics while women are mentored on more self-improvement.
But once you know these things, you can change them.
There are four levels of issues a woman experiences in the workplace when it comes to advocating for a fairer work situation that meets her ideals. As you read through the list, consider where you stand:
Not knowing how to advocate for yourself – You don’t know which levers can be turned, or the nuts and bolts of how to initiate conversations that lead to action.
Not daring to advocate for yourself – You know what you can do, but you don’t really believe it’s worth it, or your comfort level keeps you from bringing it up.
Meeting passive challenges to your efforts to self-advocate – You’ve tried to have conversations, but factors like the economy, the business, or other members of your team always seem to make it impossible to make any progress.
Meeting active challenges to your efforts to self-advocate – There are decision makers at your company that don’t want you to succeed for whatever reason, and they’ve made their opinions known (to other decision makers, definitely, but to you? Maybe not.)
For Level 1’s
“Knowing is half the battle.” -G.I. Joe
How much do you really know about the individual workplace conditions for the different employees at your company? Here are some of the questions you’ll want to explore at your company, along with a few possible answers.
What are the knobs that can be turned? (Bonus payouts. Vacation days. Conferences and trainings. Employee Stock Ownership.)
Who are the people who can make these decisions? (Your boss. Their boss. HR. Parallel leadership you may not regularly see.)
What will convince them to agree with your requests? (Networking. Project results. Key training. A competing offer.)
Just how much can you ask for? (10%. Double. More than Kevin.)
What are others getting that you’re not? (Alternate Fridays. Work from home. Comp’d flights.)
If you don’t already know most of the above, your first step is to address these gaps. You can start to find out what you don’t know by having those conversations with trusted coworkers. If you’re ready for next-level knowledge, get yourself a mentor from the leadership team and ask the hard hitting questions.
For Level 2’s
“Nothing ventured, nothing gained.” -Chaucer
The people who never ask for anything and diligently work make the boss so happy. They keep the boss’s stress low. And they never get anything than the run of the mill raises. They don’t get so little that they’re insulted, but they’re never given anything they never asked for. Big raises. Promotions. These things need to go to workers who have specifically sought them out – otherwise it’s a giant waste of company resources.
Do you want a promotion? You have to realize that the people in power are rarely more accomplished or capable than anyone else. Think about the most outrageous person you’ve ever seen in charge of a big group.
Just think, if they could be put in charge, then you can do absolutely anything.
If you’re a person who makes mistakes, congratulations, you’re still leadership material. If you’re still learning, good. You’re leadership material because you recognize your gaps and you work to address them. If you’re not sure you can handle it, perfect. The best leaders are people who rise to the challenge even when things are hard.
Ask for something that scares you. The worst they can say is No.
For Level 3’s and 4’s
Every company goes through hard times. But the important question is, what kind of No are you hearing?
Not now – If you’re hearing this then your next step is to ask, Ok, when? From your point of view, what are my gaps? What are actionable steps I can take to get to where I want to be? What metric will indicate to you that I’m ready for that next level?
Not ever – Maybe you’re getting the “Not now” answer a little too often, or you can’t get anyone to give you a solid path to the Yes, or you’ve been flat out told that you’re not the kind of person who can have what you’re asking for. That’s when you know that you’ve hit the ceiling at this company and it’s time to start hunting for another position. That’s their loss. And the future is bright.
When the hurdle is systemic, and it’s beyond your power to change, what can you do? You can sit back. Opt out of contributing to a workplace that doesn’t value you, and find a better job somewhere else. And you can hunt for that job before you quit your current one, because there’s nothing more powerful than a candidate who’s not that hungry.
Before we finish, I’ll leave you with a few things that are true about women who succeed at the highest levels:
They’re competent.
They’re great with conflict.
They tend to ignore, rather than get mad, when faced with outright disrespect.
You are an incredibly powerful, skillful woman. You are worth everything you can dream of. So make a plan, and get after it.
