Ask AdaMarie: Is cold messaging the hiring manager a power move or a red flag?
“Hi, AdaMarie! Everyone recommends reaching out to the hiring manager and/or a team member when you apply for a position. They say, “Just write to them that you’ve applied.” I asked my ex-managers about this approach and they were less than enthusiastic about this. So, what’s the truth? And what should I actually tell them if I overcome my natural shyness and decide to write a message?”
Dear Curious (and Cautious),
Listen, you're not alone! This advice gets tossed around a lot, usually with the vague encouragement to "just reach out!" as if cold messaging a stranger is the easiest thing in the world. But we get it: it's vulnerable, it can feel awkward, and it's not always clear why you're doing it or what to say.
Here's the truth: reaching out can help, but only when it's intentional, respectful, and adds value. You're not trying to "sell" yourself in a cold message. You're trying to start a human conversation.
So, what's the goal?
Not to repeat your résumé or beg for a callback. Instead, your message should do one of three things:
Express genuine enthusiasm for the role or company.
Ask a thoughtful question (e.g., about team culture or their work).
Build a connection, not just for this job, but possibly future ones too.
What can you say? Here are three scripts you can tailor:
The Curious Learner
Great for reaching out to a potential teammate or someone with a similar role.
Script 1: Hi [Name], I recently applied for the [Job Title] position at [Company Name], and I am excited about the opportunity to work on [something specific you admire about their work]. I'd love to learn more about your experience on the team and what you enjoy most about the culture at [Company]. Thanks so much, and I hope our paths cross soon!
Script 2: Hi [Name], I'm exploring opportunities in [field] and just applied for the [Job Title] role at [Company]. I admire your work, especially [brief detail you noticed from their LinkedIn, a project, or blog]. If you're open to it, I'd love to hear what your experience has been like on the team. I really appreciate any help you can provide.
The Direct-but-Gracious Follow-Up
Perfect for reaching out to the hiring manager in a professional but warm tone.
Script 3: Hi [Name], I recently applied for the [Job Title] role and wanted to express my excitement about the possibility of contributing to [specific project, value, or company mission]. I'd be thrilled to bring my experience in [relevant skills or domain] to the team. I know you're busy, but please don't hesitate to reach out if I can provide any additional information. Thanks so much for your time!
These are brief, warm, and human. And it gives your potential colleague the option to engage without pressure.
Even if they don't respond, you've shown initiative and curiosity, and that leaves a quiet impression. But if your gut says it's not the right move for a particular role or you're just not there yet, that's okay, too. Your worth is not measured by your inbox.
You're doing great. Thoughtful questions like this one already show you're intentional, and that's what makes the difference.
